ah, crap. there was a time when i felt no conscious guilt, when i could act and be certain in my righteousness. there was a time when consequences were for others, myself, i skated by always under the radar. no more, i'm my own worst fact-checker, my own mall security guard, my own conscience... and i'm tough, cruel almost. its almost enough for me to feel pity that she had to live with me... then i crawl out of my mea-culpa cuffs and remember what she did, what she told me, what she didn't tell me and what she didn't do. i'm free, but i thought freedom was supposed to feel better than this.